When You're Gone
by FallingInLove13
Summary: Aya reflects on her feelings for Toya when he's away. OneShot


Hey everyone, this is my first attempt at an Ayashi No Ceres fanfic- I just hope its okay. If you read, please review and express your opinion. Don't be 'OH IT AWESOME!' or 'This story SUCKS!!' I prefer constructive criticism. Also, I don't own the song. It's by Avril Lavigne.

This is a story based on Aya's feelings when Toya leaves her.

When You're Gone:

_I always needed time on my own,_

_I'd never thought I'd need you there when I cried._

I was always such a tomboy- I'd never, ever let anyone see my cry, never let anyone see that I had any weaknesses. I'd close my bedroom door, lie on my bed, and let out my worries and concerns until they put me to sleep. During those times, I felt alone in a world full of people.

_And the days feel like years when I'm alone,_

_And the bed where you lied is made up on your side._

But when I met you, I suddenly had a reason for everything- including my own life. Before, I had convinced myself that my reason for living was my twin brother, but, looking back, he could've made it alright without me. In fact, I was always a burden to him. But being with you makes me feel like you need me as much as a need you. I can't stand being without you, lying alone in bed, no warm arms wrapped around me lovingly, nobody to understand everything about me. Time moves too slowly. I dread the minutes, because they feel like hours, and the hours feel like days.

_When you walk away I count the steps that you take_

_Do you see how much I need you right now?_

Every time you leave, your footsteps echo in my head for what feels like forever, reminding me that your not here with me. When it's too hard to bare, I go out on the town with Yuhi and Chidori, singing karaoke and getting tipsy, but that ebbing loneliness doesn't disappear until your back in my arms. The love I feel for my family is strong, but my love for you is stronger.

_When you're gone the pieces of my heart are missing you_

_When you're gone the face I came to know is missing, too._

My heart aches. I want to hear your voice, see your face, touch your lips, inhale your scent. I don't even recognize myself anymore. I'm a complete mental wreck, always brought down by worry. I only feel complete in your arms, no matter how sappy that sounds.

_When you're gone, all the words I need to hear to always get me through the day_

_And make it okay- I miss you._

Your ones alone have the ability to lift my soul higher than any airplane. You always know the exact words to whisper into my ear to cure my suffering.

_I've never felt this way before_

_Everything that I do reminds me of you._

When I imagine the happy things in my life, you dominate my mind. Your smile, your laugh. The pure love in your eyes after we made love for the first time. A tear slipping silently down your cheek, shed for me. When I look at my hand, I can't erase how easily ours intertwine, how perfectly they fit together.

_And the clothes you left they lie on the floor_

_And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do._

I wear your shirts to bed every night. Your scent is so beautiful I could inhale it every day. It's my drug, the only thing I have from you besides my memories and the knife. I could pick you out of a large crowd blind-folded, following my nose. When I found you, you would laugh and kiss my forehead and stroke my hair- anything to please me.

_We were made for eachother_

_Out here forever, I know we were._

I've known it since the day you rescued me from getting crushed by that stupid car, but it only intensified as you risked your life for mine again and again. We're so different, yet so alike. The simple things we do are enough, anything more is amazing. We have a habit of keeping each other very much alive- literally.

_And all I ever wanted was for you to know_

_Everything I do I give my heart and soul._

Whenever I begin something, I finish it with all my might. I try so hard to perfect myself, to make myself equal to you, only to realize in the end that what you love the most about me is my imperfections. You've told me countless times that I'm a perfect Aya, and I should never attempt to become anyone else. I go at my own pace, and all my imperfections are just perfections in your eyes.

_I can hardly breath I need to feel you hear with me._

I want you here again, but I don't want to be selfish. I need you, but I know that whatever you're doing is important for but yourself and I, and I completely respect that. I'll wait for you, always and forever, 'cause I know you'll come back to me in the end. No matter what.

_I miss you._


End file.
